**Disclaimer: This entry reflects the foolish ranting and passion of a simple fan of what Pelé calls “the beautiful game” and should in no way bear any resemblance to what some might call ‘reason.’ As such, I hope you can take my opinions in the light-hearted manner in which they were conceived and with a very, very large grain of salt. Up the Villa!**
Yes, yes, Manchester United are the greatest football club in the world… blah, blah, blah.
Here are three good reasons NOT to root for Manchester United:
1. They’re too good (yes, there is such a thing). The way I see it, there is an inherent value in rooting for an underdog. This goes hand in hand with the notion of needing to have a little ‘bad’ to make the good things in life that much better. Now, if you don’t adhere to this kind of thinking, fair enough, but supporting that scrappy, second rate team that keeps things interesting with injury problems, a low budget, and hard-nosed players makes the sweet victories over the big boys oh so much sweeter. Now, as is the case with Manchester United, although they don’t have their own Ambromovich, they have the ability to lure almost anybody they want to the club and dole out the cash. Plus, they’ve won about a bajillion trophies (yes, a real number) which is all well and good but don’t you think that just makes it way too easy to support them? which leads nicely into my next point…
2. Be original. Everybody and their MOTHER roots for Man United!! Good grief… Manchester United as a company is the most recognizable label in the entire world, just above the New York Yankees (no time to get started on the Yankees). With this kind of recognition, there’s no way for an individual to be ‘individual.’ Which, from my perspective kind of goes against being a soccer fan in North America in the first place. Unless of course you’re going for the ‘want to support a great legacy and winning tradition’ angle. Psssshh, who want’s that??
3. Finally, in perhaps my most out-on-a-limb moment yet, you should not support Manchester United because they have Cristiano Ronaldo. Oh man i can’t stand this guy, and for reasons I can’t really nail down. Despite my best efforts, and popular belief, I AM aware of his massive talent and pace. I still however can’t muster up enough strength to shake off the slimy-icky feeling I get when I just look at him, on or off the pitch. And all the step-overs!! Somebody clatter him, please. Okay, he seems to be doing fewer and fewer “party pieces” as he gets older, but there’s a reason he gets all that flack from opposing fans every time he’s on the ball.
Two good reasons TO root for Manchester United:
1. You were born and raised in the red half of Manchester.
2. They’re not Chelsea.
