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For crying out loud England, decide on a new manager already!

We all know you’ll screw it up anyways, so why not get it over with? Because once you finally do pick a manager the world is going to have to hear about that saga for another six months. Nevermind that you aren’t in Euro 2008 and World Cup 2010 qualifying play doesn’t begin until August 2008, you need a manager and you need the best and you want the whole world to know it.

Please, wake me up when you’re struggling to beat Andorra to qualify for the World Cup.

Should the manager be English or not? That question seems to be as important as whether the manager will guide England to a major tournament and build a solid and successful squad.

Let’s take a look at the contenders:

Fabio Capello: He’s Italian, doesn’t speak English and seemed to have quite the attitude. Remember his interactions with a certain British Goldenballs at Real Madrid? On the other hand he’s had domestic success everywhere he’s been and is lauded as a great tactician. Also, he’s has talks set up with the FA about the job.

Jose Mourinho: It seems like the Special One would be a perfect fit for the England job, if he hadn’t just taken himself out of the running. But come on, he’s handled English players, knows how to deal with the English press and carries an air of invincibility about him that rubs off on his squads. However, he is a megalomaniac and can be a distraction.

Martin O’Neil: He’s from Northern Ireland, so that’s close enough right? He’s had success in Scotland, but hasn’t been able to turn Aston Villa around as quickly. He seems like a favorite, but who knows if the FA thinks his name is big enough for the job.

Jürgen Klinsmann: Everyone’s favorite German always seems to surface when there’s a managerial vacancy, but he probably isn’t a serious contender.

Sam Allardyce: His struggles at Newcastle this season don’t make him as appealing as he once was.

Bruce Arena: He’s unemployed and speaks English.

Whoever gets the job is inheriting the unenviable task of saving a sinking ship, albeit a ship with loads of money and talent. But please England make a choice so our sanity can be saved.

 

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